May is Mental Health Month, celebrated throughout the country to raise awareness of mental illness and educate Americans about ways to find help if they think they may be suffering from a mental health problem.
Opening up a dialogue about anxiety and depressiong is an important first step on the road to recovery. Below are tips from the ADAA for asking for help if you suffer from an anxiety disorder, and tips for helping someone you love.
Asking for Help
- While it may be difficult, be open and honest with your loved ones. They may not understand, but that doesn't mean they can't be helpful.
- If you're not comfortable talking about your problem, try describing your thoughts and feelings in a letter. It's a great way to open up communications.
- Try to explain your experiences in a way your loved ones can understand.
- When you need help, don't assume your loved one knows what you need. Be specific.
- Explain that the help you need may change from one time to the next. Such is the nature of the problem and should not be taken as a personal rejection.
- Work together to remain in situations until your levels of anxiety subside. If you must leave, try to go back as soon as possible.
- Ask your loved one to support you in feeling good about what you did do, not bad about what you did not do.
- Share your triumphs, no matter how small.
- Having an anxiety disorder is not a sign of weakness or lack of moral fiber. Remember to be patient with those trying to help you as they may not know what to do
Helping Someone You Love
- Recognize that the irrational feelings and thoughts experienced by someone with an anxiety disorder are different than the normal fear and anxiety responses that everyone feels from time to time.
- Acknowledge that you don't understand if you've never personally experienced a panic attack or other form of irrational anxiety.
- Appreciate that your loved one is aware that the thoughts and feelings are irrational, but feels powerless to stop them.
- Help set specific goals that can be approached one step at a time if necessary.
- Don't assume that you know what is needed. Ask how you can help. Listen carefully to the response.
- Accept that what may be helpful one time may not be the next. Don't take it personally. It's the nature of the disorder.
- Aim for positive reinforcement rather than judgment, criticism or blame.
- Understand that knowing when to be patient and when to push can be challenging. It's a fine line. Achieving the proper balance often requires trial and error.
Recovery requires hard work on the part of the individual, and patience on the part of the family. It may seem like a slow process, but the rewards are well worth it. My hope for everyone is to
have an open-mind to the seriousness of anxiety and depression - acceptance, tolerance and a willingness to help or just be there are the keys to dealing and conquering it.
Please remember words hurt - even if you are not aware you are saying something "wrong." If you have any idea that someone you are close to is suffering, just ask. Maybe you can save someone time in recovering.