Surrogacy can be a difficult task, as there are a lot of ethical and psychological implications. If you are considering surrogacy, you need to be prepared for this experience. Having emotional stability and psychological health is essential for a surrogate mother. There are also a number of psychological questions that you need to ask yourself.
1. Are You Prepared to Give up the Baby?
Surrogate mothers carry the baby and will have to give the baby up to the adoptive parents. This may mean that you, as a surrogate mother, may never see the baby after the delivery.
You must be psychologically prepared to give up the baby. This may be difficult, as during pregnancy, you may develop a special relationship with the baby and giving up the baby may cause depression. You may establish with the adoptive family a few rules, and they may allow you to visit and keep in touch with the child, but this depends on each family in part.
2. Will Your Friends and Family Support Your Decision?
It is highly important that your partner, friends and family support your decision of being a surrogate mother. They may be able to help you overcome the potential depression after giving up the baby. Alternatively, you will have to be prepared to get a few sessions of counseling, so that you can effectively deal with the situation.
3. Are You Happy with the Couple Adopting the Child?
When considering surrogacy, it is essential that you like the couple adopting the child, so that you know the baby will be in safe hands. Meet with the adoptive parents and ask a few questions, visit their home and make sure you are 100% comfortable with the decision that you make. It helps to know the couple has a stable relationship and they have all the financial means to support the baby.
4. Are You Ready to Give Birth to Several Babies?
In some cases of artificial insemination, it may happen that you will have twins or several babies. You have to be prepared to carry and give birth to several babies.
Also, the couple may decide to abort 1 baby in case of multiple fetuses, so you have to be psychologically prepared for this. If you don’t agree with this practice, you will have to let the couple know before the pregnancy.
5. Are You Prepared to Have the Family Present in the Delivery Room?
During the delivery, the adoptive family may choose to attend the birth of the baby, so you should be comfortable with having them in the delivery room.
Some families may also ask to attend the doctor’s visits and ultrasounds during the pregnancy.
6. Are You Prepared to Change Your Lifestyle?
The adoptive couple may ask you to change your lifestyle during surrogacy. In addition to giving up vices (i.e. smoking or drinking), you should be prepared to have a special diet, take vitamins and follow treatments the adoptive couple recommends. Discuss these details prior to surrogacy.
